I just knew...

I'm a complete basket of emotions right now. I remember the day we met. Every detail. Right then, I knew. I just knew. We would have a connection no one else could understand. It is the best thing to happen to me and at times the most painful. He can take me instantly from on top of the world to feeling I'm nothing. I do know it's not intentiona...

Moving Along

I've been out a few more times (just studying) with the boy. I really like him, but he confuses me sometimes... I'll just leave it at that. Grades came back from the first test, and I made all A's. I'm definitely happy about that! Test 2 is on Monday! I studied at Starbucks today and had the best drink of my life there!! (It was a Light Java Chi...

This frustration!

I must admit I ask for a lot but you must realise I get very little. The fact that this is school related just makes it oh-so more frustrating. I needed to get a calculator! How long has it been already? Do you know how bad it makes me look cancelling last minute but not once or twice, no, multiple times! Either you let me out more or you actual...

This and him

I sometimes wish he'd find this and read the notes about him. Realise how I feel and know more on this and that. It's the small things that make me happy but also leaves me awake at night over thinking everything.

All in your own world

Why is there always a time where I feel like I am all in my own world? I am constantly in my own world not caring about anybody else except for me. It feel really annoying. I just feel like living somewhere else where no one know me.

sometimes all you want is to be noticed, to feel accecpted, and to feel like you have no problems. ... so get over here. I'm gunna give you a hug.because sometimes that's just all that people need <3

Lies and hiding.

Constant lies, me checking up, what's wrong in asking what she has done for the day? Times that don't even add up properly so she's obviously hiding something from me, I can see her lieing yet again, what on earth am I even holding on for?

Lies and hiding.

Constant lies, me checking up, what's wrong in asking what she has done for the day? Times that don't even add up properly so she's obviously hiding something from me, I can see her lieing yet again, what on earth am I even holding on for?

Angel

So today my pawpaw passed at 6:00 am. The funeral will be on Monday I will miss school but this is way more important!!!! So therefore please keep m ein your prayers and I'll have you in mine

It all come down to who is on your side

During my whole life, the people that are on my side are my parent. I don't know about my siblings. All I know is that my parent will always be on my side. The rest are just fading in the background. I will always remember who is on my side to the end. My friends are good people but they are not on my side. They are not really the same person as...

Do you talk to yourself?

Probably. If you don't, your probably talking to yourself right now saying, "No." YOU LIAR! Anyways, you should talk to yourself positively you because you and the you you are talking to are a team, and it's important in a team to be positive.

90% of the time, people say they are, "Ok" or "fine" when asked how they are. I challenge you to, next time your asked, say that you're 'great.' Say it in a way that makes the asker believe it, and you believe it. It's all about what you make yourself think.

I'm tired of being crazy about someone who is perfectly annoyed by my existence. We had an assembly today about team-building. He was on my team, along with one other eighth grader, 4 seventh graders (a spoiled girl, a social outcast, a hilarious girl and an absolutely adorable little boy) and 3 sixth graders (a giant boy with a sweet heart and ...

I started my own blog!

Please go check out this link, would mean so much: https://itsamatricthing.wordpress.com/

Currently a Freshman in college

As of right now, I can say, I am pretty upset about living this Earth that was once so beautiful to me until I saw the bad things that come up on the news. Even though I am nineteen years old, I feel really annoyed yet delighted because I feel like getting older is better because when you are younger, you are tempted to do stupid things out of y...

What is going on with 2015?

So i know 3 other people who are in the similar relationship situation that I am in! What the heck is going on? Is there some sort of distortion in our space-time continuum for relationships? Or is there a planet alignment somewhere causing havoc upon Earth? What a great start for 2015 and know for sure it won't be an easy one.

I was talking to Brayton and he's all like, "Well, I would date you or Kaitlyn but you guys are my friends." And I'm over here thinking,"and I'm ugly"

Grasp the situation in front of you

The situation that I am in, is not what I want to be in. Being in this position that I am in is like being a tiger in a cage. The tiger want to escape very bad. This tiger want to be free from being captured inside the cage. In fact the tiger wants to run wild so that it can be free from being captured forever. That is what I am feeling. Just l...

Walking toward the right path

There are many mistakes that I made in the past such as posting picture online, going to the park with my book bag, fall in love with boys that will give me heartbreak, walking outside with short cleavage, being friend with my brother friend, not focusing on the major things like where I am going in life. Boys won't help me till the end. I got t...

I felt guilty now disappointed

"you try to be super useful while other mods don't do anything, then you become too efficient and people leave or just don't do anything for fear of breaking the system"

Old me

When I was a little girl, I used to get along with everyone just fine. Making friend with people in school was just as easy. Also relying on them was what I do until I left them. I had to rely on myself. I even used to believe people so easily. That is just the old me.

That feeling

You know that feeling in the pit of your stomach after sending a risky text, but its one of those texts you have to send, well yea ive got that feeling right now. I hope things work out.

Day Three

Well two going on three days have past and still no word. I gave him an extra day because I thought maybe he was busy, but still no word. I talked to jordanna and apperently she hasnt really gotten to relay the message. So im going to give one last attempt at trying to be his friend for jordanna sake and if still nothing after this this, at leas...

almost there! pull through and keep it together!

1st semester of senior year done! got straight A's this semester (=4.8 gpa schedule) and now i just got to keep going, pull through, second semester, maintain my straight A's and i can get the award for straight A's all 4 years of highschool(5 ppl got it last year, 2 ppl 2 years ago), and the prestigous stole i get to wear for graduation from CS...

school is an overtime job-enough said

random thought: school is 8hrs/ weekday + hours and hours of homework. school at 8am, get off 3pm, and do homework till 11pm T.T

Smoking kills.. doesn't love ?

I mean the amount of days you don't even want to be in love, the stress it gives you, all heart breaks, tears, pain, this can not be healthy for us. Yet again we go for it. And they say, the worse it is for you, the better it tastes. Everyone talks about, sings about, writes about, lives about ..love, it's probably number one desired of all th...

Introducing Queen Quita

Hello everybody! I'm Queen Quita. What Wayne say is true I'm way sexier than Nita smoke hella dro talk fast like a cheetah ice cream sweet but yay I'm sweeter Bum b****** get dropped when I come thru got a bad 1 with me we be fun times 2 I'm a grown ass woman do what I want to do September Virgo Favorite color navy blue Go ham for my f...

I don't know you. But you're amazing. Not amazing like me. But amazing like you.

Hurt

This is my first note in my public diary. When you first see me, I would appear to be a happy, healthy, and fun-loving girl. I am very much into beauty, and love shopping and all that @!#$. I get comments all the time that, "Oh I wish I was happy like you!" or, "Oh, but you wouldn't understand, you are so innocent." These comments would not anno...

Fuck It All

thats all i have to say. Fuck it.

Cut

Why do I cut? I am not an old cutter; I would not quite say I am addicted; Last time I counted I had 25... I started in Dec- beginning of Jan. Only when I'm stressed I normally cut... Or when i'm lonely...which is always... I think I hate myself.

why me?

Im so confused...hes not the guy you think he is hes different...he cares but in his own way and idk how to explain it but he does...and I wish he would drop everything and come to me...its my fault and now i have to pay the price i gave up the perfect guy and he went to a girl that doesnt even CARE about the cute things he does for her and im s...

Her name was Princess

Her name was Princess. I met her through my other friend. We became close by talking on the phone, frequently. At that time, I wasn't sure if either I like her or I just like talking with her. My friend and I sometimes visited her from San Francisco to Newark. There was a time that I tried to get hooked up with her friend, but she ended up with ...

New to this site.

I don't even know why I got this account. I am exploring new ways to express myself, I guess?

ahhhh

the hardest thing to learn is how to be happy by yourself. i need people. i crave people. i hate people. and i rely on them for my happiness and i always always wind up getting crushed. i don't know how to find my own happiness.

Everyone starts somewhere. It's where you go from there that matters.