No Good Very Bad Day

I would love to see my recent poor judgement as a bad day except there were several days...Like a month's worth of bad decisions. I hate feeling like I'm in so far I don't know what to do. Did this bad stuff tarnish a good relationship or just expose the cracks that were already there? My own weaknesses and insecurities have been laid bare & out...

Someday I wish you would realize that you love me more than anything in this world. I wish i would be the first and last choice of being your wife and the mother of our children in the future. Love should never fade, it should have last until the last day of your life.

You will always be in my heart

I fell for the guy that still doesn't value me. Almost 5 months, and i still feel something for him. He loves me also but not the kind of love that I feel for him. I still feel like I'm a 3rd option for him. He knows that I love him so much and he is taking that advantage to make me his pet once in a while.

"I hate my parents."

Not me per say, but like when teens say that it's really harsh and it's difficult to calm them down in a situation like that. It's frustrating on my account to because, no I don't know what your family is like and I don't know the situation, hell I don't even know what to say at that moment that won't piss you off even more.

Sunday July 27th;

It's great when your parents do something for you because "they want to" and then constantly use it against you. My mom's notorious for that and I can't wait to leave and go home because I'm fed the fuck up being here. There's a reason I fucking moved out in the first place.

7.24.14

Tonight, He gave me tasks to complete by my bedtime. We started something new, wearing zip ties! I love it! They are tight enough they won't fall off, but also tight enough I won't forget they're there! Such a really good feeling. Also, He had me record myself while I orgasm, and tonight while touching myself and wearing my zip ties, I listened...

La piscina

Hoy en la piscina yo hizé una pulsera. No me gusta los colores porque los representan dulce. Hubo muchos personas en la piscina hoy porque fue muy calor. Yo fui al iglesia con abuelita hoy y me gustó mucho. La gente hablaron sobre un misión cristiana a Honduras. La gente de Honduras suena como personas muy hospitable porque los dieron las camas...

Today I woke up a 10 am, then I boil my face, splash ice water on my face, exfoliate my face and use cleanest after that I use clay mask for 15 minutes, I read success for teen for 3 hour straight, I finish reading till 3 pm after that I put moisturizer on and then go eat after that I wash the dishes, I had to pack up for college at 4 pm, I fini...

I feel so guilty. I had three best friends. Alexis, Becca, and Gen. We all had our problems. We found each other at a weak point in our lives. It started when I noticed Alexis wearing wrist bands on her left wrist. First I didn't pay much attention but than I looked at my wrist and saw I was wearing about five on my left wrist to cover my cuts. ...

Dear Jack

Chauvinism.

I'm so tired of my brother being such a chauvinistic, anti-feminist bastard. Ever since I started this feminism thing, he's been out to get me. He says insulting, misogynistic comments whenever I walk in the room. And he has basic ideas that are the insolent core of misogyny...just because his lady interest doesn't like him.

Jealousy

Why can't I stop being jealous? I want him but I can't. I'm too afraid of the unknown. I want the strength I need to do what I want. Where can I find it?

What aches more than having done one wrong thing to the right person is having done many right things to the wrong person.

Sunrise

There is something special about being bathed in sunlight, especially in the early morning hours.

the letter i wrote him

i actually worked up the courage to give this to him and im glad i did so this is what i said... L you mean more to me the anyone has ever ment to me before. you make me so happy whenever i see you i cant help but smile. when i first saw you i was amazed because i didentr think i could like someone so much by just lookin...

I don't know you. But you're amazing. Not amazing like me. But amazing like you.

Hurt

This is my first note in my public diary. When you first see me, I would appear to be a happy, healthy, and fun-loving girl. I am very much into beauty, and love shopping and all that @!#$. I get comments all the time that, "Oh I wish I was happy like you!" or, "Oh, but you wouldn't understand, you are so innocent." These comments would not anno...

why me?

Im so confused...hes not the guy you think he is hes different...he cares but in his own way and idk how to explain it but he does...and I wish he would drop everything and come to me...its my fault and now i have to pay the price i gave up the perfect guy and he went to a girl that doesnt even CARE about the cute things he does for her and im s...

Cut

Why do I cut? I am not an old cutter; I would not quite say I am addicted; Last time I counted I had 25... I started in Dec- beginning of Jan. Only when I'm stressed I normally cut... Or when i'm lonely...which is always... I think I hate myself.

New to this site.

I don't even know why I got this account. I am exploring new ways to express myself, I guess?

Fuck It All

thats all i have to say. Fuck it.

Everyone starts somewhere. It's where you go from there that matters.