Journal_pane_10200851413341721

I don't get it...

I feel like cigarettes keep me from thinking...thinking about the ways I'm a failure, thinking about the things my heart wants to let out, the tears that are uncried are easier to hold back. I can just sit outside in complete silence and feel normal and ignore them. The silence can be deafening normally but focusing on the breathing and the trails of smoke give me that peace I long for without the pain. I can keep my mind off the pain when I can focus on something else I guess. I don't wa...

15 October 2014, 03:55 AM
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1 love: wonderaroundtilidie
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Journal_pane_10200851411624646

Am I?

I don't think I'm very strong so if I'm stronger than I think than that's not a big improvement. There are so many things I wish I could improve. So many things I think lessen my value. So many internal struggles that I feel I can't share. I feel very alone. And sad. All the time.

25 September 2014, 06:57 AM
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2 loves: carrosh,wonderaroundtilidie
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