Journal_pane_9534561381551175

Forever doesnt exist

I realise that the people who smile all day and those who act like they dunn care hurt the most . Its just that they dont say it all out because they dont want to seem weak . I dunn wann people knowing too much cause theyy will judge . Theyy will realise who i really am n theyy wont like it all . Thn before u know it , theyy will leave . Theyy all promised that they wont , but they always do. Thats why i dunn believee in forever. It just doesnt exist ..

12 October 2013, 05:13 AM
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Journal_pane_9534561381491985

Late at night

Do u knoww how hard it is to fight ur own thoughts ? Especially during the nights that u just cant fall asleep , no matter what u do . U just toss n turn in ur bed , thn u get up n on the lamp . Hugging ur legs , u sit on the cold floor , sobbing . As quietly as possible anw , u dunn wann to wake any1 up . N thn u havv to try to ignore n fight away all the demons n monsters in ur head . Theyy r telling u tat u r useless , a good-for-nothing . At first u were confident tat theyy were wrong , b...

11 October 2013, 12:46 PM
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Journal_pane_9534561381491023

Im sorry

Todayy i got back all my results for my End-Of-Year examinations , aka EOY . It suckxx like hell . I cann never forget the disappointment on my parents' faces when i tell them my suck-ish results , theyy were trying hard , struggling even , to maintain a calm tonee . My mom kneww i worked hard , my dad thought tat i could havv work hard . N perhaps , i didnt really work hard enough . I should havv cherish every single min . I should havv locked myself in my room n studyy till 3 in the morning...

11 October 2013, 12:30 PM
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Journal_pane_9534561381405333

The lost battle

How loud must a girl yell before her shout for help cann be finally heard ? Im tired of fighting this battle , im losing to myself .. I feel drained . I just wann to go to sleep n never wakee up .. Im tired . Too tired to continue .. But whyy m i still holding on ? M i still hoping for a miracle ? For some1 to come n rescue me ? But i should havv known . Im not a princess , n i dunn deserve a fairytale ending . I should havv known tat the more i hope , the harder i will fall . N i always fall .

10 October 2013, 12:42 PM
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Journal_pane_9534561381404862

Disappointed

10 Oct 2013 Im tired of all this crap . Every1 is treating me like some useless junk n taking me for granted . Days likee this , I dunno who i can turn to when i need help .. Whyy is it that every1 havv a true/best friend except for me ? Whyy couldnt i find some1 who is trust-worthy ? Everytime i tell some1 something , theyy will go n tell some1 else .. Days like this , I cant help but ask myself : Do i really deserve a friend too ?

10 October 2013, 12:34 PM
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Journal_pane_9534561381403972

1st Entryy

10 Oct 2013 Hii ppl :D Okayy i dunn even knoww if anyone will read this . But anw , i started this account to spill all my emotions here . U havv to knoww tat in real life , I rarely show any1 my real emotions , n this is suffocating me . I need a placee to rant .. WARNING : Im gonna sound like some crazy girl pms-ing n this is gonna be a real emo blog/diary , most of the time anw ~

10 October 2013, 12:19 PM
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