I do not need to be remembered. All that will matter is that I was here... in this moment. Every lifetime has one moment. You stand alone and you see it all so clearly. ~Nariko

I have spent my entire LIFE listening to those people that believed in you. But now, you're going to listen to me. Take my life, and the rest of my people are finished. Those that have shed blood in your name, those that have died for you will be gone, and all you will be is a rusting spoil of war. Without me, all you will become is a beautiful object to be admired behind glass. And then, you will gather dust. Then, you will die. You want to take my life? Well you took that before I even tou...

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It doesn't matter how many perscriptions they perscribe you, cause the pills can't kill the demons inside you. The monsters like to wait and feed me the bait, Little lies and made up lines, They're always torturing my mind. "Why dont you just give up right now? Theres nothing for you here accept a world of let downs." "Go blow your brains out you pathetic waste of space, You dont belong in this godforsaken place." "What a sad life you have ahead, you'd do everyone a favor being dead." "Tak...

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No matter how many perscriptions they perscribe you, the pills can't kill the monsters inside you

Have you ever been in a cloud? have you ever walked through a crowd and become nothing? Have you ever seen without seeing anything? No, I'm not high, I'm not buzzed, i'm not anything. I've just been thinking, floating throughout my day; thoughts swarming around me, trapping me in a hazy fog.

So far so good

This healthy eating buisness isnt so bad. I mean, sure, I don't feel full very often, but i'm already seeing results. Not so much change weight wise, but my mood is so much better. Im not feeling as irritable, which is fantastic because my family and I are getting along better. Not to mention my hair isn't nearly as greasy today as it normally is, which is a relief. No one wants to look like they could fry and egg on your head, even after you wash it. Lastly, and this is the best part...I act...

I wonder

Sometimes I wonder just what my life will become. Who will I be? Will I live in poverty? Will I be miserable in life? Will this world get any better? I want to go to college for art, but where will that get me? Really? There are thousands of art students, what makes me different than the rest? Sometimes I just ponder these things and want to end it all. Like what is my purpose for being here? My own thoughts will be my own downfall.

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My motivation

For the longest time I have wanted to have a strong beautiful body that reflects my true self. Poision Ivy is a beautiful, fierce, independent woman that I have always looked up to in my childhood. Her appreciation for mother earth has made her eat only natural food, and i plan to follow in her lifestyle...well minus the terrorism, crime, and fighting grown men dressed as bats.

Healthy Life Problems

Over three days ago I decided I wanted to change the way I live. No more being referred to as "Oh, you mean that fat girl?". No more having to shop for clothes that hide every lump and roll on my body. No more having to feel like I will never be appreciated because of my body shape. I've been doing well, eating only lean foods, trying to follow a lifestyle similar to what a caveman would eat. In other words, completely natural. Problem is, this healthy lifestyle isn't keeping me full. I find ...

Im Not Yours

Its terrible to think that i'm not his. I repeat the mantras over and over again, "maybe he will change" "maybe one day he will realize what he's missing" I lie to ease the truth of the actual pain. He has never and never will be mine. His heart is sold to a girl who doesn't love him. Its funny, he is in the same boat as me, but doesn't see my point of view, doesn't want to at least try. Maybe that's what pains me the most, he doesn't try. I have always been there for him, through his suicida...

New Years Resolution

During class in freshman year, my spanish teacher called me out in the middle of class and stated, "*Anita, you need to get a voice". To which I just turned red and timidly replied "oh...ok." I guess i had never contemplated the fact that I just let everyone walk over me and never spoke up for myself. Even now as a junior I still kiss ass to everyone I know, in some attempt that more people will appreciate me as a person. Like being quiet and keeping my head down will make people view me as l...