Journal_pane_9262781402626595

Her

Emanating feelings filling up my lungs, leaving me breathless. My mind seemingly wanting to evade your sight, but you're the story to my daydreaming. Never feeling it was healthy to be fixed on one person, but there's a reason why the North Star gets looked at the most. My knees are shaky, and my grip is weak, be my other half will you? Complete me maybe? You're the best one yet, to me, I don't care if people think there are more fishes out in the sea, your the one I wish to catch, you're the...

13 June 2014, 03:30 AM
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With a gentle bid and a harsh beg, the silence and unknowing thoughts keep me afar from warmth tonight. Oh the step behind the Curtain and to hid myself from what ever it may be, please don't be upset, and never say you aren't when the cause is there. Please forgive, as I'm not seeking for any more than that. Please don't leave me here, I stand firm in my hole that which i dugged myself into, I'm nothing but dirt, and belong here. The crisp of your voice soothes me to sail, but the voyage wit...

13 June 2014, 03:26 AM
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Journal_pane_9262781402626313

Hope

Just a shorter wait, just a shorted await. Expecting the bloom this season has promised us. Walking alongside the ocean filled with evangelizing mysteries that surrounds, but I have you, and those worries stand afar. Nothing but the length of this flight is what keeps me from reaching my destination. With a braver heart and a steadier hand, with a brighter smile and a sharper mind I scout out this path that might lead no where, but I have you. I thought I would have pass but the possibilities...

13 June 2014, 03:25 AM
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Journal_pane_9262781402626245

With a growing fever I set sail into the ocean, in hopes to find a cooling relief in midst the storms.

13 June 2014, 03:24 AM
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Journal_pane_9262781402625291

Untitled

The loneliness gross, resorting to roads to temporary safeguard my heart. Sacrificing more and more just to see if I'll find something, anything, when I know I won't. Realizing that helping others has always been easier than helping myself. I don't have hope for something, I don't even expect for me to complete this. The fact that I keep growing myself distant worries me, I feel betrayed and pushed out, when I give it my all and my genuine care and love. It never sufficed, not to you, not to ...

13 June 2014, 03:08 AM
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Journal_pane_9262781400822815

Implosion

Self Collapsed, seeking, an endeavor effort of self comfort within my mind. Nightmares haunting my every happy memories, with the void of ever finding true happiness. Engulfed within thoughts i cant escape, an eternal slumber sought after. A seemingly effort of Life itself to take what can potentially change all this, enthralling really that it always turns out this way. Living out my days apocryphal hopes, thinking i could change them out but they wont. This isnt about "Love" nor friendships...

23 May 2014, 06:27 AM
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Desperation

The mere fact that we have a need to write truly proves that we all wish to be heard, to be listened to, to be understood. Yet, solitude always wins over, and we remain alone, with pen and paper. The suckiest of feelings knowing that at one point we were extremely close, but little by little that vanished, and here I remain, writing about it, thinking of what it could have been. Checking my phone every 5 minutes, waiting for a response, only to get a dry and cold reply. From joking around to ...

13 May 2014, 06:11 AM
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2 loves: blaqkn8,holdingontomemories
1 comment: blaqkn8

A sense of forgives that is sought out. To imagine a life without you, to keep on going and living without feeling alive. A simplest of gestures that meant the world to me and the simplest of moments that became memories. I found you, and life decided it was best to take you away from me, left alone to imagine any place, but not with you. The seemingly minuscule efforts that I keep throwing seem to work none. What can I do dear? How can I make this so.

06 May 2014, 05:43 PM
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A certain growing hate, and an unwanted desire. With glowing cisterns carrying tampered poisons, washing away towards our memories. The morning rays light up the shadows, and secrets being made. The dizzy feeling of falling, flying within stars. The remaining pain lays within your castle.

19 April 2014, 05:04 AM
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And the world my child will start to conspire against you, and take everything you want away. but you have to carry that weight, that burden, just above that hill you're climbing. And it might hurt, and you will bleed, but that's the game we all play called life. Your body will hurt, and so will your heart, but without any risks, you'll never know if it could. And I remind you of this my child, never be afraid of standing for your own heart, and never let it get thrown around as a spare optio...

19 April 2014, 04:59 AM
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Journal_pane_9262781396325841

A glistening glow with unprecedented forgiveness. An liberation chained by memories. A fever risen from the cold efforts. A desire that's futile. A pain of wanting without efforts seen. A love without mutualness.

01 April 2014, 05:17 AM
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I once thought it could have been so, as I myself am nothing like your dad and my father. But that didn't suffice for her.

09 March 2014, 01:25 AM
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Personal (II)

Feeling like complete shit, were you stand weak and frail as you fall to your knees and beg for a change. The endless efforts I've given to simply force myself not to think of this anymore, to forget how I feel, but the fact remains within me. The tears are real, the pain is physical, the agony engulfs me, the hopeless dreams consumes me. Where do I go from here? Where do I seek the light in? Why does this happen to me? Did I do you wrong? Was I not good enough? Why does it seem that every ti...

17 February 2014, 09:37 PM
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1 love: holdingontomemories
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Personal (I)

an evangelizing lie you preach yourself, to live with it with guilty smiles, convinced that it was all there. I had failed to prepare myself that you wouldn't dream for what i dreamt for us. As broken as i was, i tried to be strong, tried to be there, tried to stand out, but i was to shattered, left in so many pieces. Sometimes i had forgotten that you had your own life, that i wasn't the only thing i had hopes you thought of. a cold play begins, with a wisp of pain gathering around my heart....

12 February 2014, 06:07 AM
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A symphonic rhythm rose. Walking into the cold, breathing out fumes, breathing out my sighs, breathing out my sorrow. The repetition of life ensues, the repetition of this goes on, the repetition of my hopeless dreams keep rolling. A removal of thoughts that I wish I could achieve, dig deeper into my force, holding me down. Have had extended my jacket to you, I had hopes for you to accept my warmth, my essence, but rejected it, walking away into the cold where you breath out fumes, breath out...

11 February 2014, 04:06 AM
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Burnt

A deep burn inside my lungs arising alongside the tears emanating from the collapse. A vicious want remaining untamed, with the effects I had hoped I had achieved upon you, never realizing it was in vain. A gentle melody playing in the background singing for you, screaming for you. The mask I wear is tighter than I had wished for, but the face you desire, and I'll endure it for your happiness. Listen to my heart, hear it's beat, it's rhythm of sorrow.

10 February 2014, 01:34 AM
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Journal_pane_9262781391964479

459

The fact that we can feel pain, joy, excitement, nervousness, enlightenment, regret, and so on, shows how us humans are susceptible to feelings and how weak we are to living on a logical manner without letting our feelings get the best of us. Believing if we give enough of something we might receive it back, fooling myself into thinking if i gave you enough attention and love i would receive it back. The knowing fact that nothing will be, yet my uncontrollable and inevitable feelings keep gro...

09 February 2014, 04:48 PM
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1 love: holdingontomemories
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Journal_pane_9262781391960499

When we look up at the night sky we wonder what could be beyond the stars, and if there is anything like us out there. But, we can't exactly find out because we can't survive in space. So, imagine if somewhere under the ocean there are "mermaids", and they look up at the light that shines through the water and wonder what is beyond the water, and if there is anything else like them out there. But, they can't exactly find out because they can't survive out of the water. Just like we sometimes ...

09 February 2014, 03:41 PM
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Ode to...Her.

That feeling you have when you are tired but you are keeping yourself up, it's a kind of a tired, but one where you don't have a need or a reason to be up but you stay up anyways. Yeah, that feeling, it's here, not because imp tired, not because I need rest. No, not because of any of that. I wish I was numb, I wish I could make it slip my mind but I can't. I understand completely, I really do, but it still doesn't change the fact of how I feel. And no reason to disguise my writing anymore as ...

31 January 2014, 12:31 AM
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The hardest part of writing has always constituted on how one chooses to start off, but the ending, oh, the ending has to be as equally as significant and thought out as the introduction, as that's what remains and gets retained the longest.

30 January 2014, 05:07 AM
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