Journal_pane_8059081397304039

Come and go

People grow. People change. And it's constant. How much you try to keep others, they just go. They just distance. But no matter what, you know that they'll forever be your friends. May be not as your close friends, but friends that you can keep for life. True, some people go but there will come. Friends that will be there for you whenever you need them. Friends who will be your shoulder to cry on. And I'm so thankful to have them. Those thursdates are worth of my time and money lol they're th...

12 April 2014, 01:00 PM
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decide on your own

Since I can't let this out on my twitter, I have to write this short entry. I just hate it how I have to keep on making decision for the sake of others! Why do I have to start planning ALL THE EFFIN TIME. Can't they make up their own minds? And they're teases us that we are indecisive?! Well, F you!

08 April 2014, 10:08 AM
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Journal_pane_8059081395329323

Skorts off we go!

It was a tough day for our college. The list of failures has finally been posted. Beforehand, I wasn't really that expecting my student ID to be there since I tried my best to pass everything. And so I did. But some did not. And included there are my friends. As we are getting closer and closer to the finish line, we are losing one another in every step of the way. Every semester, one or two of my friends fail. I don't know what to do. I feel helpless. I don't know what to say to cheer them u...

20 March 2014, 03:28 PM
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Journal_pane_8059081393417603

Reason

I wanna give up already. I sleep with a heart full of discouragement and anxiety. I always think about tomorrow. I feel I'm gonna fail. I'm little by little losing my belief in myself. I'm losing hope. I keep on failing. It's like I can't do anything that's good. I'm waking up, but I'm not living my life. I don't even know why I wake up, why I do these things. I'm wasting my effort for nothing. I just wanna let go. I just wanna give up. But then I see my mom's face. How she grows old and de...

26 February 2014, 12:26 PM
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Journal_pane_8059081393169445

My prayer

They say God hears us when we pray. But He doesn't always answer right away. I'm sure failed student prayed to Him not to fail. But they still did. So, why didn't God answered their prayer? Why did He let them fail? Cause I can't think straight for days because I'm about to fail a subject and I'm not fishing or anything. Literally, I'm failing. Not because I didn't do enough. But because of a circumstance I don't know whom to blame. I don't know how but my professor wasn't able to receive my ...

23 February 2014, 03:30 PM
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Journal_pane_8059081390316478

weak

It was a sad enging for us. I thought I was already strong. But you're my krypton. I now admit. It hurts. So bad. I tested myself to see how will I feel if I passed by you. Maybe you would notice me and say hi. After all, we're friends. I did as what my mind tells me. I passed by you. But you didn't say hello. The hell was I thinking? You were with your friends, yes, but can't you even voice out a simple hello? If I looked your way, see your face, would you say hi? Or will you just look at m...

21 January 2014, 03:01 PM
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Journal_pane_8059081390316120

The truth will hurt

Friends, I'm sorry for lying. Dear seatmate-most-of-the-time, I didn't intend to lie to you face to face. It's just that I'm not in the position to tell you the truth. To my other friend, bebegirl, I'm so sorry. We've been lying to you about it. I don't want to play with your feelings and let you give false hopes, but what can we do? It would hurt badly if you know the truth. I am your friend no matter what. And I don't want you to get hurt. Can't you just like another guy? Not someone who al...

21 January 2014, 02:55 PM
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Journal_pane_8059081388762588

Lesson Learned from 2013

The year 2013 has been a tough year for me. Can't remember the times I shed tears. Can't remember how many sleepless nights I had. Life slapped me in the face of what it really looks like; that life is hard. No matter how many friends you have, or how close your family is, at the end of the day, it will always be you. You will have to face your problems alone. Because only you yourself can help. People will come and go. This year, I've lost friends (and I think you know who you are) but I've ...

03 January 2014, 03:23 PM
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Journal_pane_8059081387864443

the other friend

Just a quick update! About the mermaid and that guy, I'm kinda fine it with. Last night, I saw a picture of them together and for me, I didn't feel any rush of blood or activation of my sympathetic nerves. I was... okay. But that's not the point of this entry. Just today, I received a text message from someone. And that someone is Kelvin's friend!!! How I wish it was Kelvin! :( Just months ago I received a friend request from him on facebook and I thought it was just random and nothing. But w...

24 December 2013, 05:54 AM
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pre-christmas happening

this week has been a hell it's our first monthly exams. I had too much of sleepless nights (well, more of sleep-deprived kind of nights) and all I wanna do right now is to relax. Unfortunately I wasn't allowed to go to my friend's sleepover. my mother is not in the mood to let me  but what's the highlight of today? I was able to see mister. And yes, it kinda hurts seeing him. I'd rather not see him at all  I began to remember things, of what really happened. Until now, I haven't figured ou...

14 December 2013, 08:12 AM
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I just have to rant it quickly. I just hate how you treat us like shit. Like how you think of us low. Like the others are too perfect. How could we ever learn if you never teach? Then you expect something great from us? Why don't you just run your center and stop "teaching" cause it's nonsense and stop bragging about your Mac book laptop. You may have the riches in the world but I know you'll never be complete without a family of your own.

08 December 2013, 02:19 PM
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Journal_pane_8059081386397425

"Someday,we'll forget the hurt, the reason we cried and who caused us pain. We will finally realize that the secret of being free is not revenge, but letting things unfold in their own way and own time. After all, what matters is not the first, but the last chapter of our life which shows how well we ran the race. So smile, laugh, forgive, believe and love all over again" It says everything. One day, it'll be okay. Everything will be back to the way it was before. I'll wait for that day to c...

07 December 2013, 06:23 AM
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Journal_pane_8059081386397131

SHE SAID

I think I've made this entry on my written diary but nevertheless, I'd still like to post it here. You told me to stay away from him because of his attitude, because he is not a good person. You got this idea from your friend, "the mermaid". She told you that there was a time when "mister" was being rude and perv-ish. The mermaid said to miste to stop whatever he is doing. Then she told you about this. Then you told me about this. I actually didn't know at first what to do about this issue s...

07 December 2013, 06:19 AM
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the truth

From today, I learened that people aren't so good. There are those who will wait for you to fall down. Those that will see failures in you. How much more haters can I accommodate? Everyday I have to show them that I am strong and that I'm still going. To my bashers, haters gonna hate. Potatoes gonna potate. xoxo, HazelWhite ♥

15 November 2013, 06:21 AM
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Journal_pane_8059081381673803

Weekend getaway!

The day after my first sem ended, I already made plans with my college friends. Without my parents knowing, my friends and I went to the south!! Somewhere in Cavite. Super great time!!! We met friday afternoon then went straight to their house in Cavite. By around 5pm we decided to go to Tagaytay to go to Sky Ranch (the picture was taken there)! We had our dinner at LZM. It was a treat from two our friends who had their birthdays days ago hehehe then the next day, we went to Eagle Ranch where...

13 October 2013, 03:16 PM
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Journal_pane_8059081380798984

Boundaries of friendship

As the sem gets nearer to its end, the more we run against time. The more we feel tired because of the overflowing and unlimited things to do. Everything seems to be a battle between you and your grade. And sleep! But it's even a harder battle to compete with your friends. Since we are no longer in the same class, there are times when we have our quiz/practicals first than the other section. There are some things that need to stay between the class or else the others will have the advantage t...

03 October 2013, 12:16 PM
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Journal_pane_8059081379665847

Yesterday (9/19/13) felt like hell to me. It was one of my worst days. If it wasn't because of those irritating irregular students of our class, nothing like this would have happened. Two of my professors walked out the classroom because others were too preoccupied doing unrelated things on their subject. I had 3 subjects yesterday. We had our quiz on the last subject and reporting too. Few people were chit-chatting at the back of the classroom that's why our first prof got irritated. It was ...

20 September 2013, 09:30 AM
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Last Saturday, I had a mini heart to heart talk with my mother. She mentioned my cousin's state. My cousin, fyi, is an autistic. He was diagnosed when he was still a kid. Their family migrated a few years back. Recently, my uncle emailed my mom. He mentioned how my cousin is not responding well to therapists despite the regular sessions. We thought maybe it's not just autism. Maybe, mental retardation? I am in the science field, and therapy field. I'm quiet familiar with those kind of people....

02 September 2013, 02:28 PM
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Journal_pane_8059081377528889

When I Cried

I just couldn't take it. I finally cried in front of my parents because of too much stress and frustration. This weekend was a long weekend. Since it's my cousin's birthday, we checked out in a five-star hotel in Clark, Pampanga. The place was amazing. The room was totally gorgeous. If that was to be a condo, I would love staying in that kind of place. There's a kitchen (except for stove), living room, common toilet room, one big room with comfort room. It was really relaxing. The swimming po...

26 August 2013, 03:54 PM
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Journal_pane_8059081377449273

LOST

The title says it all. I read my entries before when I was in second year. I talked how "stressed" I was that time. Little did I know that those are just preceding events. Bigger stressors are coming my way. Before, I was just stressed with HELLthcare. Now, I'm stressed w all my subjects!!! Oh, wait. Except SCL. Prelims will be this week but I can't tell if I'm ready enough. Tomorrow, we'll be having our group implementation and God knows how stressed I am!!! For days, I've been crying becaus...

25 August 2013, 05:48 PM
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