JANUARY, BE GOOD TO ME!

So, after my rather unorthodox way of celebrating New Year's Eve, here I am again. Now what? Not much I can do for now but keep on moving forward. After all, that's the whole idea: moving on. I've started reading Arundhati Roy's "The God of Small Things" I borrow from Tony B. Other than that, I'm still writing. I write whatever I feel like writing. That's all. I guess this is how growing up can get to you. You fear expecting too much of anything and then get yourself disappointed in the e...

02 January 2014, 07:50 AM
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MORE THOUGHTS OF A CHAOTIC MIND...

First of all, this is rather unusual. I don't normally do this. I'm sort of celebrating New Year's Eve...alone. My parents are home with my sister and her family. My brother's with his girlfriend and her family in Rawamangun. My friends? They're all away, doing their own stuff. And I've just finished another writing challenge online. Hope they'll like it and I get to win the prize. Happy New Year 2014, everybody! R.

31 December 2013, 07:04 PM
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...AND THE WORLD KEEPS SPINNING 'ROUND...

So, apparently...Mr.Quiet Lad (T’s more recent ex) has returned. He’s back in this country after having been in Dublin for quite a while. He’s probably still dealing with his jet-lag in BSD (where he lives when he’s here.) T’s left some stuff with me for him. T’s also given him my number. Just a text or a call and a meeting can be arranged. That’s easy. Still, this is also going to be awkward. I mean, honestly – I don’t know how I’m going to answer if Mr.QL starts asking about how T’s been ...

30 December 2013, 12:37 PM
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THE GREAT KING, THE GUARDIAN OF THE ISOLATED CASTLE, AND THE CAT

When you read the title of this entry, I’m sure you’re thinking: “She must be writing a fantasy now!” Sadly, no. It sounds like a cool fantasy title, I know, but I’m talking about my own recent situation this long holiday. In details, they are actually: 1.The Great King  Dad. 2.The Guardian  Me, when no one else is around and I happen to be the one who doesn’t ‘look busy’. (Alias, no social life, away from work at the moment, and...single. Ha, that’s how they normally define me!) 3.The...

26 December 2013, 05:22 AM
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"THE FALLEN MORTAL"

The feeling’s too familiar. She’s been through this before. It doesn’t get any better, even when they say she’s supposed to be stronger. Where is her heart now? Does it still properly beat somehow? Why does she still feel so low? When will these haunting ghosts just go? Can she take another fall? Is she on her way to a bottomless black hole? Why does she have to keep playing the same role? Will love ever send her to a more purposeful goal? Once again, she is the fallen; not a star, nor ev...

26 December 2013, 04:47 AM
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"TODAY"

I don’t need today to celebrate you. They can do whatever they want to do. I believe in what’s really true. No symbols can ever represent this love for you. I don’t need today to celebrate you. Why now? Every woman deserves this too somehow. Only to you, I bow. I don’t need today to celebrate you. Why can’t we do that every day? Why won’t they? What if I don’t have good enough words to say? I don’t need any other day to celebrate you. Why? I’ve already got the rest of my life. I’m afraid t...

22 December 2013, 03:15 PM
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A DECENT SPACE TO WRITE...

A local website for aspiring bloggers like me loved my article. They’ve approved my free membership and published that entry on their site. (For free, I know, but it’s good for starters.) That means my Indonesian blog will get promoted more in the future. One thing at a time. First things first. All in good time... And I’m thankful for this long holiday. A week of relief from work... So he’s back home now. I bet he’s celebrating Christmas with his family now. Good for him. He once asked me...

22 December 2013, 02:44 PM
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BEHIND THESE (IMAGINARY?) WALLS...

How do you know that a person means so much to you? After they have left, you find yourself saying this with a sigh: "Oh, well. Time to go back to the real world." That's just exactly how I feel right now. It's kind of weird. I mean, I'm aware that I work in a place with quite a turnover - one way or another. People come and go, just like that. So far, I've been doing a pretty good job not to get myself too emotionally-attached to any of them. I guess he's just...different. He's one of the...

19 December 2013, 12:48 PM
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"SHE IS?"

Who is she? Are you silently wondering, as you turn and walk away? Life is short, and time loves to flee. It's your last day, yet she remains a mystery. You've seen her smile. You've watched her cry. You've had good times for a while. Do you still find yourself wondering why she happens to be more than meets-the-eye? From the open gates to her isolated castle, she'll silently whisper her goodbye. No, never again will you see her cry. She's much too proud for that; she'd rather hold her head...

18 December 2013, 01:47 PM
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SOME THINGS YOU MAY NEVER REALLY KNOW ABOUT ME...

Hey, you! Yeah, I’m talking about you. Do you know who you are to me? I can say quite a lot about you – even if we’d only got to work together for just four months. Believe it or not, sometimes it doesn’t take long for one to notice how good you really are. Don’t be too surprised, since I’m not the only one feeling this about you. It doesn’t need one to hang out all the time with you to discover what a good friend you are. You’re simply being the genuine you. ...

16 December 2013, 11:05 AM
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"LEAVE YOUR BROKEN HEART HOME"

Wake up to the same reality. Be as strong as you can be. You’re still alive and breathing, you see? You’re also free! Some feelings should be left behind. Some things should be out of your mind. I know it’s easier said than done, but do it soon before your sanity’s gone! Face the world as it is. Solitude can give you the coldest kiss. For now, you shouldn’t ask for more than this. Maybe next time you’ll catch up with the bliss. Leave your broken heart home. Nobody needs to see it. Perhaps ...

16 December 2013, 10:25 AM
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THE FAREWELL SPEECH

I can't believe that I've finally decided to take your challenge seriously. Like I've already said: I'm not good with goodbyes. For me, sometimes it doesn't take a while to know whether someone is a really good friend. One doesn't always have to hang out with that particular person to know such things. When Tony B. first told you that I was also a freelance writer, you'd gazed at me as if I were J.K. Rowling or Stephen King. I wish I were, but I'm still not even close yet. Please pray that ...

10 December 2013, 06:27 AM
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COUNTING DOWN...

No, I'm not talking about counting down to New Year's Eve. It's still a long way and I don't really celebrate it anyway. It's counting down...to the day he's leaving. I'm still coping with the whole thing. I'd seen him briefly on Thursday and Friday. We traded jokes and laughed together. He winked his beautiful blue-green eyes at me and I could only smile back at him, feeling sad and helpless on the inside. Don't cry, I silently ordered myself. Please, don't cry. Everything's going to be a...

09 December 2013, 08:15 AM
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"FROM THE TEXT"

http://referenceforwriters.tumblr.com/post/68828015140/30-day-poetry-challenge Day 2- Who was the last person you texted? Write a five line poem to that person. (For T.) Pardon my goldfish-like memory when it comes to this four-hour gap. Just a bit of your time to talk to me before you go to sleep. Sorry - and goodnight! Love, R. (Jakarta, 8/12/2013 - 9:20 am)

08 December 2013, 04:19 PM
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"R.U.B.Y."

http://referenceforwriters.tumblr.com/post/68828015140/30-day-poetry-challenge Day 1- Write a poem where each line starts with a letter from your first name (an acrostic). It can be about anything, but it should not be about you or your name. Roads traveled in search for what's pure, under the same old social pressure. Being you often means fighting to the last stand. You're sick to death of their constant demands. R. (Jakarta, 7/12/2013 - 6:00 pm)

07 December 2013, 12:17 PM
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"JUST ANOTHER BALLAD..."

This is a ballad of a storyteller, watching a real-life, moving pictures in front of her. Can she be a part of it? Can she get a role, even just a tiny bit? There are tales she can tell. This one she can do well. Even when she can't find the (right?) words to say. this is still the game she has to play. This is the story about love, so unrequited it scares her enough. 'Though many have told her to shout it out loud, she still knows what she'll end up without. This is the ballad of a storyt...

02 December 2013, 08:43 AM
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(LESS THAN) 14 DAYS...

Someone suggested that I let him know how I truly feel for him. (Doesn't that sound familiar or what?) At least I could get this off my chest and just work my way to move on after that. That sounds like an idea, but here's the situation: He's engaged. They're getting married soon. He loves her. She's a nice girl. He's leaving soon. Most importantly, he thinks I'm an amazingly sweet friend. We don't sit next to each other or talk everyday, but when we do talk - it's always something meaning...

02 December 2013, 07:39 AM
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"THE HESITATION"

When a heart gets broken by the oblivion and impossibility, one must survive with their head and what's left of their faith. Sometimes that's the only way to be. What if you're dying to tell them how you feel, while at the same time wishing it weren't real? Would you be ready for the consequences? Would keeping quiet be one of your biggest regrets? Your head and heart are at one of their familiar wars, while a tiny voice somewhere in there is loaded with words you're aching to share: "Do y...

30 November 2013, 06:00 AM
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CRY ME A RIVER...

I am thankful for today. In fact, I can still be thankful for a lot of things that you should be proud of me, hehe. I am thankful for life. I am thankful that God still lets me live, despite the bad things that I've done in the past and those I somehow keep on doing. (Yikes!) Once again, I don't know why I deserve this - but I'm glad that He still wants to give me another chance to live and repent. I saw him briefly. We still grinned at each other, traded jokes and laughter. We also gave ea...

30 November 2013, 05:35 AM
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"FOR THE GIRL IN THE MIRROR"

To the girl in the mirror: How could you let yourself suffer from the same, old 'crash and burn'? I thought you'd already learned. What has gotten to you? Why are you making me sing the blues? I've already told you I didn't want this. You know damn well this ain't no bliss! Are you sure this is love? Well, haven't you done enough? All we need these days is some decent, personal space. How dare you put us in such disgrace! Hey, why are you now so quiet? Has your mind been filled with riot? ...

28 November 2013, 09:34 AM
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