"BAD NEWS"

I don't know how to tell you; for too long I've been dying to say. The last time I spoke the truth, you breathed fire and pushed me away. Tell me, how long must we live like this? Perhaps it's just different things we see. There's too much that we've missed. I know what I need to say, as much as I'm aware of the consequences. Sadly, there's always a bitter price to pay, even when one has used their common sense. I guess I have to do what I have to do. That's why I've got b...

26 February 2013, 05:29 PM
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"THE SILENT TREATMENT"

We don't talk about feelings anymore. We just go about our days, pretending everything's okay. You once said this was the only way. We don't talk about what really matters. You believe it's for the better. I'm tired of hiding behind these masks. What makes you think our little charade will last? We don't talk a lot. No, not that much. Even if we do, I'm not sure all we say is true. We don't talk. It's all snippets of daily mundanes. We're too afraid of dealing with the pai...

21 February 2013, 07:26 AM
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"SO LONG, 'SANCTUARY' "

I have never been (treated) a princess all my life. I don't think I'll ever fit the role. However, I'm also unsure about calling myself a warrior, although you've always believed that I am Ms.Independent - ever since we met. I know it's kind of annoying that I need to be reminded that I DO have the power to carry on. You know how the world is with me here. You have seen how I was and helped me to become how I am now. We both know there are still more miles to go and I am not about to give u...

20 February 2013, 11:10 AM
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"ONE CREEPY FLASHBACK"

How did you know that I loved you so? No, you didn't. I just hung out with you as often as I could. Not much I could do. How would you know, when this has only been as far as I could go? They said I should've done more than just one show. Telling you the truth might have given you more clues. How do you know that I still love you so? No, you don't. Even if you do, it won't do us any good. I hope you never will, so I can have this killed. Don't worry, I'm not standing stil...

12 February 2013, 08:32 AM
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"SEARCHING FOR YOUR SMILE"

I've been searching for your smile; I think I've seen in for a while. Where did it go? Why don't you let it show? I know I've taken your smile for granted. For years, it has gone under-appreciated. I guess I am also one of your ungrateful brats, having failed to see you as my greatest gift from God. Tell me now: Have we forever lost it somehow? You still go about your days, pretending everything is still okay. I understand that we have to keep moving. The clock is ticking. ...

10 February 2013, 08:47 AM
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"FROM ONE VINDICTIVE UNDERDOG"

Let me enjoy you squirm, as reality starts stripping you off of your arrogance. I am openly content with these moments, shaking the higher ground where you stand. You still look down on me, the way you keep on treating everybody. You think I can never fight you back. Soon I'll be able to throw you off the track! Now I am growing stronger. They are starting to know me better. I am having all the fun in the world, while you're still busy trying to get people hurt. Is that the only way to ma...

10 February 2013, 07:28 AM
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"I LOVE YOU JUST THE WAY YOU ARE: REALLY?"

"When I see your face There's not a thing that I would change 'Cause you're amazing Just the way you are And when you smile The whole world stops and stares for awhile 'Cause girl, you're amazing Just the way you are..." ("Just The Way You Are" - Bruno Mars) I can't wait for that new TV series "Beauty and The Beast" to air here in my country. The first season may have already aired in other countries, so I'll probably just sit tight and wait, rely on YouTube, or...simply downl...

08 February 2013, 10:32 AM
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"THE UNPRISSY DAME"

I don't want to be your average kind, although I barely stand out like any ordinary girl. I'm just fine, even when I disappear in the crowd; just another stranger. I don't need to be a diva, who can't live without getting everyone's attention. I can be just one of the audience. I'm no Cinderella, and I'll never forget to keep my pairs of shoes. I believe I also have the right to choose. I don't want to always stay home; all safe and sound. I can also roam around the town, even on my own. ...

30 January 2013, 11:47 AM
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FLOODED...

Not much I did for the rest of last week. I only had one class on Monday, then I helped Ma and my brother with the catering business from Tuesday to Wednesday. After that, we picked my sister up from work and then took her to her OB-GYN. On Thursday, the biggest flood of the year struck Jakarta. Although my house was safe, thankfully, Pesanggrahan River had overflowed that both access routes to the central city where I work were clogged by heavy traffic and...of course, flood. I coul...

23 January 2013, 07:32 PM
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"AS I WANDER THE STREETS AT NIGHT..."

I often see you there as I wander the streets at night. They usually pass you by without a care. Somehow, I don't feel it's right. I know what you're doing; no questions asked. You've got no time and space to care about what they think. You only know you're doing your best. It's always just you and the baby on your lap; a poor little boy with a giant head. You smile at me every time I stop by, even with only coins, a bottle of water, and a silent wonder why. I still see you...

23 January 2013, 05:30 PM
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AFTER THE RAIN...

Some people say there is always a rainbow after the rain. We can just look up and spot it in the sky, especially if there is enough light from the sun or if it is not too polluted. What if the clouds are still much too dark, too thick? What if the rain has not really stopped yet? What if it keeps coming back because it is just the weather we have to deal with now? People deal with things in life differently. For those who call it 'a bad luck', they believe that their fate has been seale...

20 January 2013, 09:33 AM
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"THE DEMONS IN THE GOVERNMENT"

The demons in the government; wanting to recruit one of their own. Some 'fit-and-proper' tests required, to see if he were perfect for hire. They were laughing out loud, belittling death sentence for the rapists in this country, questioning: "Should we?" The demons in the government; they believe the victims deserve the rape. What's wrong with them? Have they all turned into senseless apes? Their laughter still rings in my ears; a sign of dead empathy. They've simply promote...

19 January 2013, 03:38 AM
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JAKARTA: A FUTURE 'ATLANTIS' IN THE MAKING?

I was supposed to go to work last Thursday. Although this Friday seemed fine, I had no teaching schedule. I'm also not working tomorrow, because the school is closed to avoid the possibility of people having to deal with the second wave of massive flood. There isn't much that I can do now. The nature has once again warned us; another serious wake-up call way too many times. Haven't we all learned, or have we chosen to succumb to apathy or ignorance - or even both? I'm not going to talk ...

18 January 2013, 03:17 PM
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"TOO BAD, SO SAD"

"She's a little bit childish," you used to tell everyone as you introduced me. Back then, I only had one wish: I'd wanted to ruin your fun, because you were such a bully! I understand you were on top of your game; a pretty,popular girl surrounded by countless of fans. Everyone knew your name. You'd lived in such a perfect world. I knew how you'd always looked at me; a little girl who knew nothing, a freak who couldn't fit in. To you, I was always silly. You never really gav...

14 January 2013, 05:23 AM
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NOT MUCH...

Not much to say about me.I know that sounds like half a lie,because I actually have quite a lot to tell.I just can't think much of anything at the moment.Seriously. For those who have just popped by,welcome to my reality soap of life.I'm just an ordinary thirty-something from Big Durian,with a family,a job,and friends.I'm a teacher,a freelance translator,a freelance writer,and also Ms.Independent.I'm into singing and acting as well,but unfortunately I've never really got a chance to make n...

14 January 2013, 04:44 AM
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"UNDER THE GLOOMY SKY"

I am standing under the gloomy sky. Some say it can make you cry. I wonder why. For me, for a while, all I have to do is close my eyes. I just picture you, standing tall beside me. You always look good in blue, and we've been so happy. Under the gloomy sky, you'd smile at the raindrops; enjoying the soft, cool breeze as we paced. I could see the glow in your face. I open my eyes. Look, I still have my smile. Worry not, my dear friend. Someday soon, may we have those beautiful days again. A...

12 January 2013, 06:33 AM
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THE REALISTIC SOAP

As strange as it sounds, I see life as the realistic soap. Why? How come? Good questions. First of all, I grew up reading a lot of stories and listening to a lot of music. I also grew up watching a lot of movies and TV series, so I guess that's why I've got such vivid imaginations. There's nothing wrong with that. I enjoy it. So why 'the realistic soap'? Eventhough this is my journal and I'm (mostly) telling the stories from my point of view, I hardly feel like the main character ...

11 January 2013, 09:32 PM
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"ON BEHALF OF ALL-INDONESIAN FEMALE BIKERS"

"I am the man," you proudly claim. "I am doing this because I can." It is not the first that I hear such a silly statement to me. Your words inspire hatred instead of fear. "I am the man," you senselessly reason. "I have my weaknesses, don't you understand?" I see. Your eyes often go against your will. Although a woman is fully covered, you still can't help staring at her body. "I am the man," you raise your voice with obvious contempt. "I am also the leader, so yo...

09 January 2013, 06:06 PM
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A SHORT ADVENTURE IN BOGOR

I haven't been to Bogor in a very long time. That's why I was glad when I got the chance to do that with Gigi last Sunday. We were meeting our friends Lisa there. It was a wonderful day, despite the fact that I had a sprained waist. Why? How come? Good questions. Perhaps I'd woken up on the wrong side of the bed. (I didn't believe in such terms before this.) Anyway, Gigi and I took AgraMas bus from Lebak Bulus to Baranangsiang Terminal. It was an easy, comfortable bus ride. We had...

09 January 2013, 05:08 PM
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"FROM THAT GIRL WITH THE CHILDLIKE SMILE"

I was the shadow from the past, lurking silently in the dark, watching you from behind your back. I am the friend from the present, side-by-side with you, sometimes hand-in-hand. My loyalty cannot be masked. Don't ask me to pretend otherwise. I am the little sister, only wanting to make you feel better. I know at times I can be annoying as hell. Now you've known me too well. I am also the one with the hero-complex, a so-called, stupid Cupid without an arrow and a bow. I kn...

03 January 2013, 02:31 PM
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