"CAN'T SAY MUCH ABOUT ANYTHING RELATED TO MY LIFE LATELY..."

Hey, there. It's been a while since I last wrote about my life here. I have been...well, not just hecticly busy - but also mentally exhausted and overwhelmed. It's gotten so bad that I still don't socially function well. I try, but this feels like I'm on the edge every time. I feel like I'm about to break...and this is not healthy. I've been troubled in my sleep by nightmares. I can't focus. I've been crying pretty much a lot lately. I don't eat well. So, what's been going on with me lately...

16 June 2015, 04:45 AM
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"#RIP ANGELINE"

little girl in this mortal world just another soul with innocence taken for granted lost by ignorance little girl, gone missing and out of sight where were you, dear child? a major search with all their might you’d disappeared for days and nights you should’ve been home safe; this wasn’t right little girl found buried under the ground the beasts had lurked about killing her without making a sound this ain’t no happy-ending fairy-tale once again, society has failed providing safety and com...

14 June 2015, 03:22 AM
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"YOU"

Where have you been all my life? I thought I’d lost you I still remember those nights, back when everything felt true How have you been? You don’t look so different, I’ve seen It’s been ages since we last talked Have you no idea that I’ve missed you a lot? I’m glad that we’ve met This time, please don’t forget I’d like to catch up with you, dear old friend I hope this time, I won’t have to lose you again R. (Jakarta, 29/5/2015 – 3:00 am)

14 June 2015, 02:20 AM
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"BOTH SIDES OF EVERY STORY"

Sometimes it takes two to tango. There are things that you just can’t do alone, no matter how good – and that we all know. That’s why we have a pair of arms, hands, and legs. Hold things firmly with both hands so they don’t easily break or fall. Stand straight and tall. There are both sides of every story and that’s nothing new. What’s mine? What’s yours? Bet each would be different. How many of us who don’t get easily trapped in a “who’s right and wrong” argument, without providing a soluti...

13 June 2015, 11:38 AM
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"A FAG HAG'S CONFESSION"

Alright, I’ve been spending so much time with Hazel Eyes lately that almost everyone knows that. I fell sick on Monday. That was completely out of the blue. How annoying! My throat was parched and it really hurt. My body was burning up. Hazel Eyes had kindly accompanied me to the clinic. The result? A major sore throat. Aside from the prescribed antibiotics, the doctor had also given me another list: - No cold drinks. (What? Nooo!!) - No fries. - No sweets (except from fruits.) - More veggi...

29 May 2015, 01:07 PM
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"ALL MY LOVE EVER DID TO ME..."

All my love ever did to me Not all they could see They thought I was lucky and our relationship was lovely All my love did to me The bruises and scars I wouldn’t let them see They still looked at me with envy as I tried staying strong as I could be All my love did to me including saying sorry telling me: “I love you, baby. Please forgive me, but don’t make me angry!” All my love did to me was making me feel less worthy It was getting harder to avoid his fury, but I forgot how to set myself...

28 May 2015, 12:11 PM
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"BIG PLANS..."

Let’s start with my weekend so far. I taught Saturday classes all day as usual. I overheard Ken, one of the expat teachers, yell at the staff for having forgotten to hand the books to the students who’d already paid. Then I returned to my rented room nearby. I had a chat with my best friend Hazel Eyes (who also lives in the same building as mine but in a different room) for a while. My phone buzzed and I answered it. It was my brother. He said he wanted to have dinner with us. He and his ...

28 May 2015, 03:49 AM
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"COLIN'S 'MAGIC POTIONS' "

“My favourite wizard boy!” cried the old man happily, as Colin rushed into his bedroom and his open, weakly arms. They both hugged each other tightly and the old man kissed his forehead. “How are you?” “I feel good, Your Highness,” Colin replied, also happily. “Are we ready for another magic potion testing today?” “As always, my boy.” The old man ruffled his dark hair. “But don’t forget to put your schoolbag in your room.” “Okay.” Then off the boy ran into his room and dumped his bag th...

25 May 2015, 06:02 PM
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"WHAT'S ON THE TIMELINE TODAY?"

Check out her timeline. Everything looks fine. She’s on the spotlight. Her life seems picture-perfectly bright. Should you give in to your personal envy, when she’s all you wish to be? You look at your own life, your standard of living stuck on ‘survive’. So what’s classified as ‘fair’? You don’t even know what’s really ‘there’. Perhaps she’s just putting on a show. It’s ‘behind the scene’ that no one really knows. Welcome to this online circus, where pictures are digitally-beautified to h...

24 May 2015, 05:07 PM
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"WRITER@WORK"

Basically, I’ve always been a writer at work. Why? I started writing at the age of 13 and haven’t stopped ever since. I see life with everything in it – people and all – as interesting stories to tell. In fact, I often wake up in the morning with the same anticipation to write something, anything. What do I do? I’m a freelance writer and a freelance translator. I’m also a freelance interpreter and a part-time English teacher. I’ve got my first novel published locally in my own native tongue...

24 May 2015, 03:51 PM
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"DEATHS BY SELFIE"

What’s going on in the world these days? Instant popularity leads the souls astray. Technology helps them to do what they may as if it’s the only to fill their days. Everybody wants to be seen. Excessively taking pictures of themselves, they’ve been. The road to fame is just a click or two. Hey, maybe you can do it too! It’s not just all about looking pretty. They also want all the glory. They’re more than keen on getting the world to see that they are really, really ‘somebody’. But they a...

21 May 2015, 05:38 AM
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"OH, CHARMING ABUSER!"

You buy her everything all your money can bring even that 24-carat diamond ring in hopes they’d make her heart sing. You take her to fancy places your fancy car can reach in a winning race. You show her off to those admiring faces like she’s your trophy, your most precious property. Oh, yeah. I bet you always have it your way. Everything should be under your control, they say. Obedient, you wish for her to stay. You may be perfect for some other girl who only cares for diamonds and pearls,...

19 May 2015, 03:13 AM
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"AN AUTHOR IN THE MAKING..."

A struggling author in the making. Yeah, I guess that’s just how I see myself these days. So, my very first book is finally coming out on May 25 in local bookstores. YAY! Congrats me. It’s a start for a dream come true. I’m on a brand new journey... What’s next? Keep on writing, of course. Keep looking for another job too. Unlike in some other countries, being a novelist (especially for the very first time) here doesn’t always automatically make you rich that you don’t have to keep your reg...

18 May 2015, 06:12 PM
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"SLUT-SHAMING"

Your lame effort makes me smirk, wince, and want to puke my guts out, yet I’m just sneering at your double-standard, because I know what you’re all about. It’s just your not-so-subtle way to justify your forever perverted thoughts. You say it’s part of the rules. You don’t care if it’s cruel. Imagine it’s your sister. Would you let them do that to your daughter? You say it’s all about mentality and personality. What do they have to do with one’s virginity? It’s none of your business, don’t ...

16 May 2015, 07:29 AM
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"ENOUGH."

Here we go again. I’ve never thought that once again, you did that. You just had to, didn’t you? It was your childish, irrational tantrums that had to stop. I’ve had it. We all have had it. Enough is enough. This is not the first time, and I’m afraid it won’t be the last until we put a stop to it. Right, where do I start? Damn, girl! Your drama’s getting way too old. Get over it and grow up. Move on, we’re not in high school anymore! Yeah, I got your message. Apparently, you sent that to e...

16 May 2015, 06:52 AM
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"WHEN ALL'S BEEN SAID AND DONE..."

Rome wasn’t built in a day, yet many can be destroyed in seconds. Toxic can spread from the words you say, leaving poisoned hearts rotten. What do you expect? Like instant noodles in a package? First, make up for what you personally lack. Perhaps, we can minimise the damage. Oh, yeah.... no worries. I’m also familiar with freedom of speech. You just want to be honest, like your advice is the best. In your case, freedom of speech is a one-way-street. Your only concern is ...

14 May 2015, 11:01 AM
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"YOUR PROFESSION"

I remember you and the first time we met. We were at a friend’s party at the club that night. You walked up to my side, wondering why I just stood in the corner and watched the band playing and other people dancing. I told you I just wanted to enjoy the music and the band’s performance. Besides, I’m no dancer. And soon I’d be going home anyway. Why? You asked me. I told you that I wasn’t the clubbing type, but it was an old friend’s party. Besides, I could use this experience as a writing id...

09 May 2015, 02:27 PM
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"SAVE ME!"

Save me! I didn’t know the ground would shake so badly. It was so scary. Try searching for where I might be, perhaps you could find me, even if it were just a body, and my spirit might have flown freely. Save me! I don’t know everything, you see? I was just following orders. I should’ve asked more questions. But they lied to me, while I just needed money. Now they’ve left me alone to die here. Save me! Please, just save me. Don’t let me drown to die in this slow, painful apathy. Show me tha...

09 May 2015, 03:25 AM
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"THESE HARD TIMES: SLEEPLESS NIGHTS"

There was no point in that sleepless night. Your eyes hurt under the bright sunlight. You can’t enjoy the day. All you want is a hideaway. “Why so worry?” he often asks me. “Sometimes you just need to let it be. Perhaps it will set you free.” Still, it is hard to deny. If only I could lie that everything is alright, yet my instinct keeps telling me to fight. We’re still quite far from the dreams we’ve been chasing. Don’t let them die yet, ‘though our spirits feel like sinking. Say you won’...

27 April 2015, 03:04 AM
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"THICKER THAN BLOOD?"

It’s the same old story; one that remains untold. The characters acting happy as reality remains cold. “Everything’s okay,” they always say. “It’s always just another ordinary day.” Oh, say whatever they may! I wish it weren’t so, but I guess some things can be thicker than blood. I can only be as far as I can go, even with what I’ve got. Tell me you love me. I know you always will, but how come those words sound so empty, like this numbness within that slowly kills? “You’re not making an...

20 April 2015, 12:36 PM
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