Anxiety // 12.03.16

It's 11:30 at night and my mind should not be thinking and my body should be shut down - I should be sleeping like the rest of the world. Instead I am awake during the depths of the night due to an unwanted revisit of an old enemy whom I thought I'd sworn off forever. I lay in the dark as horror movie images flash through my head putting me in a panic and causing me to turn the lights on. I roll back over aware that I will not be able to get any sleep. My eyes start to fill with tears and my ...

04 December 2016, 05:36 AM
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Terrible Day // 11.28.16

I haven't had a day as bad as today in a long time. First, I found a message from my almost 20 year old boyfriend to a 15 year old girl that says, "if you were my age or vice versa I'd flirt with you nonstop" and it made me so mad. My boyfriend is in the military and is currently off at basic training so it's not like I could just confront him. So, I messaged her. I took a screenshot and I asked her to explain and she said he was "trying to make her feel better". I know my boyfriend would nev...

29 November 2016, 12:43 AM
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The Odyssey // 11.27.16

Hello, lovelies! I had recently decided to become a creator, aka a writer, for the website The Odyssey Online! I am super proud of myself for finally doing something that truly makes me happy. I would appreciate it oh so much if you would check out some of my writings! I wrote this one on toxic relationships: https://www.theodysseyonline.com/to-the-girl-in-toxic-relationship and I wrote this on on being a military girlfriend: https://www.theodysseyonline.com/what-youll-learn-as-military-girlf...

27 November 2016, 09:30 PM
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Wow // 11.24.2016

To be completely honest, I forgot I even had an account on this website. I was reading through my email today when I stumbled across one mentioning this website, because I had gained a follower. I was instantly confused as I had forgotten completely this existed, so I clicked on it. I was redirected to my page and saw all my old entries I had written. I was taken aback, to say the least. Reading back on these entries and just being able to reflect on some of the hardest times of my life makes...

25 November 2016, 01:51 AM
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1 love: jessicaelizabeth
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Only you // 9.6.15

I dated this guy named Sam for a year and a half. I was with him the summer before sophomore year, all of summer year, the summer after sophomore year, and half of junior year. So that relationship alone takes up most of my high school experience... I look back on memories and they're all with him. It kinda sucks because even to this day, I am over him completely but I still see myself with only him. I think the sole reason for that is because of how comfortable I was with him and he never ev...

07 September 2015, 04:27 AM
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5 loves: juju_j1991,LivinLikeLarry,jiannahshayne22 , ...
7 comments: itsokaybby,juju_j1991,aptouchton , ...

Broke // 9.5.15

Homecoming week is going to brake me. I have my homecoming dress for the dance, i need to get heels, I need to get a shirt for speedaway, I need to get a color day shirt, and i am going to make a shirt for senior white out. I am losing so much money, but I will still get it back. I just hate spending this much money in a such a short time span.

05 September 2015, 04:41 PM
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Dress // 9.4.15

So I found my homecoming dress already and purchased it. It is a tank top style dress and then upper part is tight while the bottom is loose and straight. It is glittery and lacy. I don't know if I want to wear black or red heels yet... I was thinking red but that depends on if I can find ones I like in a store that isn't online.

05 September 2015, 04:40 PM
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HOMECOMING // 9.3.15

I have decided to go to homecoming. I didn't plan on going at first, but then changed my mind. I changed my mind because it is my senior year and I do want to remember as many things from this year as possible. I am graduating early but I am still going to walk, I am still going to homecoming, I am still going to senior banquet... the only thing I am unsure of is prom. That depends if I have someone to go with or not. I am looking forward to everything this year brings though, even though I d...

05 September 2015, 04:39 PM
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1 love: jaranashad
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Relapse // 9.2.15

I am in one of those moods where I just want to take a blade, watch my skin come apart and blood come out. I feel so alone, worthless, empty. My mom makes me feel happy and good about myself, but she is the only one. Whenever I think about school I realize how alone i really am, and how I don't have many friends. Whenever I need someone to talk to, I never have anyone to go to. That's when I realize that i don't have many friends. It honestly really sucks because I feel like I am a good frien...

03 September 2015, 12:04 AM
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1 comment: danielalopez.2.9.1998

SEPTEMBER // 9.1.15

Crazy how it's already September first. I only have around three months of school left and I am honestly so excited! I cannot wait to be done! It sucks because I honestly feel like I have no friends in school. I have people I talk to, but I only talk to those people in class. They're not people who talk to me outside of school, and it makes me sad because I would like to talk to them outside of school... I just never feel good enough. That's the main reason I hate high school, because in all ...

03 September 2015, 12:00 AM
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1 love: astoldbyher
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inventory // 8.31.15

It is the last day of the month, so you know what that means!? MONTHLY INVENTORY AT WORK. This is awful. We are stuck there until we count every single thing in the store, and we are usually there an hour past when we are supposed to get out. It doesn't help that I have school tomorrow and I just wanna get home on the quicks and sleep. It is kind of annoying how they make us do that. It should be a job for the managers, but I guess it's part of being an adult... doing things you do't want to.

02 September 2015, 11:59 PM
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work drama // 8.30.15

There is so much drama going on at work right now. I don't even wanna discuss it because of how childish it is! It makes me so mad that some people can get away with acting like such a child like it's not a big deal. This girl seriously quit over text, came in crying and then got her job back. Why would you give someone their job back after they quit over text? I do not understand.

31 August 2015, 03:39 AM
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1 love: geeanndelorino
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Meh // 8.29.15

I CANNOT GET OVER TOMMY. It is annoying the absolute hell out of me. I know he does not, and most likely never will, feel the same way back towards me. It really sucks because I like him a lot. I have to work with him and see him and it makes things hard because during those times he is always making me laugh and smile and happy and i enjoy it so much. I just enjoy his company and his presence and just him as a whole.

31 August 2015, 03:38 AM
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1 love: geeanndelorino
1 comment: chrissy1876

Falling apart // 8.28.15

For some odd reason, I feel like I am starting to spiral back down into my sadness. I can't figure out why, but I feel like I have lost most of my happiness just over the course of a few hours. Maybe it is because Tommy doesn't like have feelings for me back, or because I feel like my best friend, but whatever it is, I just feel like I am going back into a deep dark hole that was so hard to crawl out of. I want to stop it before it gets too bad, but I just don't know how to stop it. It makes ...

28 August 2015, 09:55 PM
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1 love: geeanndelorino
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Personal Statement // 8.27.15

In school I am taking two different English classes. English four, which is the basic senior english, and Rhetoric, which is college level English. In both of my classes I am writing personal statements that we can use for college applications, however, I am already committed to a college. Since I am already committed to a college I wrote about why I want to go into child psychology. I wrote about my struggle with depression and self-harm and I am afraid my teachers might look at me different...

28 August 2015, 02:00 AM
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Rejection // 8.26.15

I told my best friend that I have feelings for him, and got rejected, sort of. I was basically told that I am only a friend which I understand... I don't want a boyfriend anyway. It just kind of sucks because I didn't purposely develop these feelings nor did I want them, they just happened. I wish moving on was a quicker process than it is, but it isn't. I'll get over it eventually, but for right now, I have to deal with it.

28 August 2015, 01:52 AM
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1 love: so_mordasini
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self-harm // 8.25.15

I never realized how far I've come with self-harm until just now. I look back and realize that I hurt myself a lot, ever since middle school. I never really considered it a problem, but now that I don't do it anymore I see it as just a surprise. I don't even know how it feels to be that sad since I am no longer that sad anymore. I was always so depressed and I always wanted to self-harm and I think the main problem was because of Sam. I am so happy now to the point where I cannot even imagine...

26 August 2015, 02:01 AM
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1 love: jenna.gladwell
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hospital // 8.24.15

I had to rush my mom to the hospital today, and it was the SCARIEST thing ever. It really made me realize how much I love my mom. I cried so much before going into the hospital. Turns out she has a kidney stone on each kidney, and that's nothing good, but it's better than some things that it could have been. We went in not knowing what was wrong, and i'm so glad it wasn't something that could result in death. I have never been that scared before and I will never again take my moms name in vain.

26 August 2015, 02:00 AM
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Kindness // 8.23.15

I feel like there are so many people in this world who could be so much nicer than they are. There are so many people nowadays who are rude and have an ugly personality and it is just so unnecessary. Everyone has potential to be nice caring, kind and respectful but NOBODY DOES THAT. It just sickens me knowing that people have this chance and they pass it up. Be nice to everyone and make the world a better place.

24 August 2015, 01:48 AM
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1 comment: chrissy1876

Could make you happy // 8.22.15

I could definitely make this guy happy and give him the whole world and more, but he only looks at me as a best friend and I only look at him as a best friend... well I think. Again, I just do not know. I wish there was a way to talk out my feelings and come to a realization but I think it'll take more than talking to figure it out and it honestly really sucks man.

23 August 2015, 03:00 AM
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