Sometimes dark shadows catch up...

Today, old memories haunted my mind. Everytime it happens, I just try to accept it, learn from it, see things that I didn't notice before, when I remember these moments. But I ran away from them once again. The agony inside of me was growing, and I didn't have enough time. Perhaps one day..

28 July 2015, 10:34 PM
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Hmm..

There's this thing I have with pictures. Honestly, I fear what I see in my portraits. Although I do like the concept of capturing a moment in life, I hardly ever like what I see in my pictures. I'm not that pretty, so I'm embarrased to post a picture where I don't look good at all. But I'd never post a picture in which I look prettier than my reality self. Because then, I feel even more uglier, seeing that I can never actually be that beautiful It's the same with make-up, the more I use it,...

23 July 2015, 10:42 PM
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Let me tell you something..

There's this quote I've read recently which goes a bit like this: They want you to be as good as them, but they never want you to be better. You know, have you ever walked around and stood somewhere for a long time, on bended knees, like in a 90 degrees? It must be tiring, you feel weak. But though your muscles hurt, they're also burning with passion. Then again, people can easily push you down... That's how I have been living and maybe how you might've been living, in case you feel its f...

19 July 2015, 12:02 AM
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Why I hide

Deep inside, people cry. That's what I believe. In today's society, asking for help is the same as asking for attention. How sad must one not be, to no longer be able to hide it. Afraid of judging, afraid of showing weakness, afraid of the people who will just break others for their own entertainment. Because it's cool, right? All the smart comebacks and such. and they wouldn't care. Because it's you who needs to muscle up, it's your own fault for being weak.

18 July 2015, 10:25 PM
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But it still happens now and then...

I tell myself not to dream of someone saving me. Only few are blessed, meeting rare hearts and minds so pure, eyes that can see through broken masks and care for what lies beneath. A rare breed that actually tried and tries to help any way possible. You see how impossible it seems. The only definite way to make it possible is to be that person yourself. If you can breath, you can live. If your body can manage to keep you from falling, even with all the weight on your shoulders, you can ho...

14 July 2015, 10:59 PM
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Sometimes I just wish..

There are times like today, I can't even breath. The expectations of my loved ones are contradicting, how can I grow, if I can't expand my own borders. How can I appreciate what I have, when I can't see what else there could be in life. It's not that bad... even if I feel like choking, as long as my body refuses to let me stop breathing, I'll survive. I just hope it gets better, every single time.. even if right now, I feel like it's only getting worse.. Help me, I'd love to say that... bu...

14 July 2015, 10:20 PM
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Empty, but still overflowing

I feel nothing yet I feel too much. I have days I want to scream and cry my eyes until they're too dry for tears to be rolling down my cheeks. Yet on those days, I've been told a lot my face is as stone, cold and without emotion. they are right.. On those days as I want to 'express' my emotions, I believe I release them, leaving me empty. I never cry on those days.

11 June 2015, 10:00 AM
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the feelings are destroying me from the inside out... For a while, I was destroying them as well, until I realised it was just like water, it vaporizes and when everything cools down, all returns to its former state... water... now I just... pfft.. so tired of it all..

27 May 2015, 07:18 PM
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We're never alone.

Even if I think I am... I know I'm not, because I'm not the only one who's alone... who feels lonely in dark times. It doesn't mean I should ignore the pain and emptiness I'm feeling.... that's how I think about it... because I don't want to feel it.. I want to fix it...

27 May 2015, 05:49 PM
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This is life

Sometimes, you just have to say to yourself "This is life", get up and move on, walk on the broken pieces, once your heart or soul, moving on because you have to. You may not want to, you may not be able to, but at least you're standing, walking... there is no time to heal your wounds, nobody cares about the blood you're shedding, because they don't look down to see something else, except your face. that surface... it has to be perfect. I need time... please be patient with me, because I wish...

19 February 2015, 06:27 PM
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Funny how you can be so desperate to write something down. Once again I try.. but when the pen and paper are ready.. where do I start? The words I want to scream are choking me. My head becomes heavy as I become tired. The moment I go to sleep. Everything will clear up, like it's nothing... until next time...

10 November 2014, 10:24 PM
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